is that a rock?

The burrito artist took pity on your fat ass.

As a queer liberal millennial and a professional carpenter who may present very clearly either way depending on context, I would like to point out that the cops also do this but the other way around. You win some, you lose some.

this post highlights how the tortilla and the baked potato are similar in that they’re just empty vessels waiting to be filled by fixins; in less ideal restaurants this expression of culinary freedom is known as a ‘a bar,’ but this is based on hearsay since i’d never set foot in a place like that.

i think this is a profound statement on culture and class that will, no doubt, go over the heads of many reading this.

we all love sour cream no matter what race we are, what culture we belong to, and i think that’s absolutely insane if you think about it, that we are capable of liking the same things despite differences that seem important if you think beyond sour cream. how can such a simple food bind us together?

i never actually thought about why it’s called sour cream before it was dolloped on a traditional taco bought in a border town in mexico when i was visiting to purchase an inexpensive crown–this is when the sour stood tall against the savory blend of spices, yet despite this feud they complimented each other, and this nearly broke me because my sheltered palette had never known such flavors–what an astonishing blend of mysterious ethnic spices you’ll never find in a packet.

but my smile is a little crooked and they fixed that up for a budget price. it always bothered me to work in a professional environment and not have a perfect smile, i could feel the judgement in zoom meetings although nobody ever said anything. they made really good burritos in _____ , and i’ll never forget that just like i’ll never forget my perfect smile courtesy of mexico. no more chipotle for me, only food trucks, and i tip my gardener an extra 20%.

care to explain?

Yeah. You should eat it.

I know this is a shitpost, but here’s the explanation: you can’t force people to like you.

You may get off on power trips going to businesses where people aren’t allowed to deny you service or return bad attitude in kind, but everywhere else you’re a $1000/hour with a forty hour minimum payment in advance work starts after the check clears kind of guy.

I can explain. The kid ordered everything on theirs, the parent ordered nothing but meat, rice, sour cream, cheese, and extra victim complex.

If he’s so liberal, how come his burrito is on the right, hmm?

Went to Chipotle with my wife a few years back (I dont really care for it, pretty bland) and this is the same sort of disparity between mine (left) and hers (right). Also I’m considerably more left than she is, for what that is worth.

That’s a burrito? From the opened bit, I thought it was a big russet potato.

“Visibly liberal”, AKA: younger, healthier weight, healthier skin, doesn’t look like a leather bag that was forgotten in the sun?

“visibly liberal” == no hat?

Clearly Chipotle thought your liberal son can handle more meat than you.

Damn I want a burrito now

Edit: unexpectedly delightful news. Costco now has low-carb burritos (regular burritos mess up my diabeetus) that are actually pretty decent. Mission accomplished.

Left just got a meat burrito, right actually asked for stuff?