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Gonzako@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 day ago

Gotta shit the right way

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Gotta shit the right way

lemmy.world

Gonzako@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 day ago
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  • PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca
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    21 minutes ago

    OP can’t answer, they haven’t reached that age yet

  • Mediocre_Bard_Redeux@lemmy.world
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    1 hour ago

    Why is that toilet hooked up to a dryer vent?

  • GordonBrightfoot@discuss.tchncs.de
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    8 hours ago

    AC Slater style

  • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Using a flexible dryer tube for a toilet drain is… I’m gonna go with ill-advised.

  • TabbsTheBat (they/them)@pawb.social
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    1 day ago

  • stiephelando@discuss.tchncs.de
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    1 day ago

    That plumbing don’t look right to me

    • jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      “Now, I’ll just connect the toilet to the sewer line using this 4 inch vinyl exhaust hose and some duct tape. That oughta hold.”

      • turtlesareneat@piefed.ca
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        1 day ago

        The best part is, the artist could have walked to their nearest bathroom to notice toilets go down through the floor, but they decided, nah let’s elephant trunk this shit, that’s gotta be how it works.

    • snoons@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      That’s a high-powered vacuum designed to suck even the largest of shits right out of your colon.

      • jaybone@lemmy.zip
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        1 day ago

        Lot of potential South Park references in this thread.

        • PancakesCantKillMe@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          The Couric load is massive.

    • wjrii@lemmy.world
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      21 hours ago

      The flexi-tube is certainly a… choice… by the artist, but it’s just a back-outlet or rear-discharge toilet.

      spoiler

      • mrmisses@lemmy.world
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        12 hours ago

        Wild

    • Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      1 day ago

      It’s for his elephant dong

      • snoons@lemmy.ca
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        21 hours ago

        “I don’t have to flush, I just stick it right in there, all the way to the hilt.”

        • Brave Little Hitachi Wand@feddit.uk
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          20 hours ago

          I am become poop knife, destroyer of swirls

    • Soulphite@reddthat.com
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      1 day ago

      There’s no pee-trap.

  • zxqwas@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    You don’t get partial credits for sitting on the toilet. You have to take your pants off before.

    • macniel@feddit.org
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      1 day ago

      Pants are of no concern, when you are QUANTUM SHITTING THROUGH THE N-TH DIMENSION

      • okwhateverdude@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        • jaybone@lemmy.zip
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          1 day ago

          Shroedinger’s Scat

    • TabbsTheBat (they/them)@pawb.social
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      1 day ago

      I always forget that step :(

  • cobn@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    23 hours ago

    Incorrect, as you are more valuable when going to the toilet and should position yourself for optimal position to retaliate in case a ninja/pirate/swat bursts into your bathroom.

    🚽😅

    • Hacksaw@lemmy.ca
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      13 hours ago

      “you are more valuable when going to the toilet” is the most mysterious thing I’ve read all week.

      Why? To whom? What specifically about the toilet? Does my value also increase at urinals? What about if I shit in the woods?

      So many questions.

      • pastaq@lemmy.world
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        9 hours ago

        Pretty sure ‘vulnerable’ was intended.

  • toothpaste_sandwich@thebrainbin.org
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    1 day ago

    They both look so furious.

    • dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      He is mad because his toilet is hooked up to a dryer vent and she’s furious because, for some reason, her toilet uses electricity instead of water. Both sound like smelly affairs.

      • PhoenixDog@lemmy.world
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        24 hours ago

        And both shit their pants and are wondering why it isn’t in the toilet.

    • Klear@piefed.world
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      1 day ago

      Willing your pants away takes concentration.

    • Abyssian@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      How else do you force it out at quick as possible? Takes concentration. You need to close your mouth and push out with your poo muscles while simultaneously trying to force air out of your closed mouth. As illustrated this advanced shitting can make your entire face turn very red, then get super pale. It’s because all of the toxins are leaving with the poo.

      • ickplant@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        Pretty sure my step son used this tutorial, he passed out on the toilet once.

        • Abyssian@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          Glad to hear he’s trying to keep up with the latest medical advances in shitting. ^^

      • Winter_Oven@piefed.social
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        1 day ago

        aneurysm speedrun any %

        • Abyssian@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          You misspelled it, the brochure I got says it’s called “Analeurysm”, and is the certified medical practice of releasing all the toxins your body otherwise pulls from the air through osmosis and accumulates for no real reason through your anus.

          I heard about from the health blogger who sells me snake oil wellness shakes. To be honest, I was a bit skeptical at first, but I asked my Chiropractor when I took my 6 week old infant child in for the adjustment of the newborn, soft, still malleable and forming bones in his back that he’d told me the week before all babies need so they don’t develop crickets and he assured me that Analeurysm is 100% legit and even hooked me up with the brochure at a discount.

          I try to always follow the latest medical science, and Chiropractors are legally allowed to call themselves doctors, so we can all be sure they know their medical science and are all straight shooters who can be trusted al your infant’s spine, the latest breakthroughs in shitting, and all of our money. 👍

  • Apeman42@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    He knew.

  • onnekas@sopuli.xyz
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    1 day ago

    Also you’re not supposed to pull down your pants.

    • dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      Hahaha look at this dummy who doesn’t cut a shit hole in his pants!

      • onnekas@sopuli.xyz
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        1 day ago

        Well, I sit on the toilet like in the picture and proceed to shit my pants like it’s supposed to be done. No poop hole needed sir!

    • icelimit@lemmy.ml
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      1 day ago

      Shit hard enough to have it seep through the pants. That’s how you make sure it goes in one flush.

      After you’re done, flush the pants. And yourself.

  • dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    I was at least tomorrow years old.

  • 1984@lemmy.today
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    20 hours ago

    The gen-z toilet stance.

  • Monument@piefed.world
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    1 day ago

    Side-saddle gang.

    I don’t know if I was a small kid or potty trained early, but I distinctly remember having to sit sideways until my parents got an adapter seat, because my (likely malnourished) skinny ass would wind up in the water if I sat straight on.

  • betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Twist the flush handle like it’s the throttle on a motorcycle and pretend the sound of rushing water is the growl of your bike’s engine.

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