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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 months ago

Modern Cinderella

slrpnk.net

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Modern Cinderella

slrpnk.net

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 months ago
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  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
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    7 months ago

    I mean if it just falls out on it’s own, you’ll need to get a new, bigger one anyway and the prince won’t find who it fits… Because it no longer does.

    • Pilgrim@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I like how you really thought this through.

      • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
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        7 months ago

        I’ve experienced it. 😉

        • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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          7 months ago

          Kolanak, you are a beautiful, multifaceted weirdo, and seeing your comments really help make Lemmy feel like home. Please do some kegels to help ease your gaping asshole.

          • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
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            7 months ago

          • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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            7 months ago

            After finding out what the male version is I’m now constantly wondering who’s doing kegels without the people around them knowing

            Filthy animals… 😈

            • A Phlaming Phoenix@lemm.ee
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              7 months ago

              We clench among you…

    • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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      7 months ago

      Alternatively, achoo

  • urquell@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    This is a story I can get behind

    • expatriado@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      you had to plug your comment don’t you?

      • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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        7 months ago

        Wait, they didn’t give us a full rebuttal!

        • rarbg@lemmy.zip
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          7 months ago

          Don’t be anal.

          • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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            7 months ago

            You’re not a lawyer?

  • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Did you hear?!!! The prince is going around the kingdom trying to find his true love 💕😘! If the butt plug fits you, then you could be the one!

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 months ago

      Does… Does he wash it first?

      • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        The prince does no such things. Now turn around, let’s see if your the princess 😘💞. It’s gonna feel a little warm because he just tried it over there.

        • Pilgrim@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          That last sentence cracked me up

          • Classy@sh.itjust.works
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            7 months ago

            Why do I hear progressively closer popping noises??

        • CitizenKong@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Well, princess or “princess”.

  • Forester@yiffit.net
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    7 months ago

    Fur slipper > Glass slipper > Fur tail

    I love it when jokes come full circle.

    Fur slipper was likely a nod and wink that the prince knew Cinderella intimately…

    • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      The Prince was asking women to pull up their dress so he could inspect their snatchpatch?

    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      That makes the story so much funnier.

  • Fester@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    In the old tale, the stepsisters mutilated their feet to try to fit in the slipper. What’ll they come up with this time?

    • Zachariah@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      goatse

  • Awesomo85@sh.itjust.works
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    7 months ago

    “My God! It just falls right out!! It’s you!! You are the one I turned out last night!!”

    • dmMeYourNudes@lemmynsfw.com
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      7 months ago

      I can’t with you right now

  • MeatPilot@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Instead a size check, it’s a sniff test.

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 months ago

      sniff smells like tacos

      • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        That’s the wrong buttplug you’re smelling…

        • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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          7 months ago

          Christ, that’s the risky click of the day

          • Pilgrim@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            Did you not trust the link-text at the bottom, which you see if you hover over it?

            There still was a risk, but it turned out to be exactly the product I was looking for

            • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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              7 months ago

              I’m on mobile so it was a true 50:50

              • Pilgrim@lemmy.world
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                7 months ago

                I would never click such links on mobile lol

              • Rain World: Slugcat Game@lemmy.world
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                7 months ago

                just long press (at least on jerboa)

                • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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                  7 months ago

                  And here too?

  • psycho_driver@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Prince Charming probably will have fun testing it out on the step-sisters at least.

  • BobbyGasoline@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    This is one of my favorite stories, second only to the princess and the pee.

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 months ago

  • Sam_Bass@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    lost her gas slipper again

  • socsa@piefed.social
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    7 months ago

    90% chance this was as a queen, not the princess

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 months ago

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZ7wB4rm5Hw

  • Meron35@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    There must be a gay Cinderella remake out there somewhere. Grindrella gets visited by the fairy thotmother, who transforms his button up shirt and black skinny chinos into a harness and jockstrap and sends him off the royal orgy. The next day Prince DomTop has to go around and top everyone in the village because it was a blackout orgy and he couldn’t see anyone, meaning the only way he can find who Grindrella was is by remembering the feel of that bussy.

  • Phoenixz@lemmy.ca
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    Great, dump it on the street for a kid to find it and pick it up and play with it…

    • Iapar@feddit.org
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      7 months ago

      Person got scared by a honk. Happens.

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