There’s probably some sociology at play here. If you ask a guy and a girl to look at their own finger nails, they usually do it differently.
Guys tend to bend their fingers with their palm facing towards them - since their main concern is checking if there’s any dirt under their nails.
Girls tend to straighten their fingers and point their palm away from them - since their main concern is how their nails looks to others.
So yeah… when guys are taking dick pics, they need to override that tendency and be more mindful of other people’s perspectives.
Wellthats assuming i have a midriff… and not a hairy ass beer belly :/
The good news is that there are women out there who like hairy beer bellies more than fit and shaved guys.
The bad news is that you still can’t take the type of dick pic in the OP because it’ll look fugly
The other good news is you can bypass this issue by not sending dick pics
Plus, according to one source, while you may call it a beer belly, some may call it a dad bod, and some may call it a Gladiator physique.
The post is about taking pics not sending, so no good news here :D
But always remember to leave the head out of Frame.
Which head?
Yes
Yeah, but women are fighting to gaze upon The Dong. I can’t give them a bad picture
I’m not usually one to get jealous at these kinds of pics, but that original plastic-bottle person seems to have a freaking awesome room.
Sending images of vaguely phallic objects as dick prosthetic will never stop being a bit funny.
Nobody out vaguely phalluses the fat innkeeper worm.
Oh, this? My tin can? My massive fucking flip-flop? My super stuffed baguette? My wibbly wobbly banana? My fucking fabric stretching wind flapping gravity defying helicopter rotor? You mean this super-duper ultra-hyper god-damn motherfucking sausage?
God if more men had midriffs like that
Hey I’m sure plenty of us do, we just don’t wear the clothes to show it. If I wear a crop top women think I’m gay and that’s unfortunately counterproductive
Just wear a hot pink crop top with “I’m Straight” bedazzled across the front
Wearing nothing but booty shorts with “straight man” bedazzled on the ass and a feather boa in straight pride colors.
If you smaller than a MONSTER MEGA GULP 750 swipe left manlet
Can someone post some artistic male nudes, for, umm… some inspiration?
A long time ago, back on reddit, someone posted a link to a site that was something like ratemydickpic.com. That doesn’t load but a cursory DDG search brings up some similar sites.
On that site, people would post their dick pics, as you might guess. The owner of the site would review not the dicks, but the pics. Lighting, framing, effort, etc. (I don’t know much about photography.) I remember specifically that several of the commenters (and I, though I was mostly a lurker) observed their approval of the fact that the phalluses didn’t matter, it was just the setup of the pic. In fact, several of the pictures were of non-external-genital-havers (I’m genuinely trying to be inclusive, so I apologize if that’s offensive) using various forms of prosthetics, but that didn’t factor into the reviews at all.
I’ve never been the type to send those kinds of photos. Back when Snapchat was big for dirty pictures, my wife and I decided to try it out. We installed it, sent each other one naughty photo each, and uninstalled it. (Not quite in such short order … But basically.) Pretty sure that’s the only one I ever sent. However, were I to do so, I would do so consensually and probably have appreciated the lessons from a site like the above.
What if my dick is still in a can?
Check the expiration date, but you should be okay.
This you?
Ridiculous. That shi should never be sold in a can.
Fr, I bought it once just for giggles and it tasted awful. Straight to the trash.
Maybe heating the metal of the can will cause it to expand and release the cylinder?
The cylinder MUST remain unharmed
Keep it away from Prince Albert.
I like my prince Albert…
Was it put there by a man?
In a factory, downtown?
Is it even possible for common man to take artistic nudes of themselves? Or is it just so far out the realms of average guys that it might as well be impossible?
Edit: further contemplation on the subject/idea.
Obviously biased opinion, but it does seem to be significantly easier for women to take artistic nudes. Just a nude is already good enough, adding in minimal angling and lightning and it’s already artistic nude.
For a guy, sub 10% bodyfat, with some muscle mass/few years of solid training at the minimum, perfect lightning, professional photographer, dehydrated, pump. Or yeah, the “dad bod” or bear mode, of once again shit tons of muscle mass up to off season bodybuilder, just with a slight faded abs(~15%) and “some” bodyhair.
For 99,99% of the guys, that’s kinda impossible standard.
it does seem to be significantly easier for women to take artistic nudes.
I think what a lot of people don’t realize is just how many shots are needed to get that one good one. Especially if doing it yourself.
I sent a really classy-looking black and white (because it evened out my skin and made the lace look extra nice) once, and it took me about 40 tries to get one I liked enough to send it. It took awkward positions, my arm got tired af, and if you’d been there in person it looked dumb as hell. Arms in weird places to hide them, legs bent funny, you get the idea. I had to try numerous poses to see what worked and didn’t, and it took about 45 minutes.
I’m by no means a photographer, I’m by no means a model, I’m not even a sexually-inclined person, but I am stubborn and persistent, and I’m introspective enough to know that if I think it looks nice and classy, most others will too.
I think that’s why women tend to have artistic photos and men tend to look like the swamp thing. Dude nudes tend to be the first pic they take, quality be damned. And often in dirty mirrors (do guys not know how to hold a phone to take a selfie without a mirror?).
Now that i think about. I have been a bystander few times when some women have taken pictures, it does seem to take a lot of takes and time. Last one was a random birthday picture and even that took around 20-30 minutes and uncountable number of takes, i got bored, stopped counting and went to the kitchen to grab something to eat.
At the same time i haven’t seen many men do the same they seem to just take a random first picture, even if that and that’s good enough. The exclusion seems to be guys who are photographers or are into it as a hobby.
(do guys not know how to hold a phone to take a selfie without a mirror?).
No, i do not. I wasn’t even aware thats possible. After 4+ years of training and trying to take peogress pics at the end of each phase, i still haven’t figured out how to take pictures of my back or frontal pictures without a mirror.
Yes it is possible, and quite fun. I think the main thing with artful nudes is decentering the genitals and kind of focusing more on the whole body. It doesn’t need to erect, fully exposed, and center of the frame. I’ve got a picture of me posing sort of wrapped around a rifle, flaccid dick half covered by the rifle. I by no means have an impressive body, I’m very skinny and not very tall, but this image fucking KILLS whenever I share it. The image has a sort of juxtiposition between the shy/coy body language and the rifle being a symbol of strength/power. You feel me?
That’s a good point. Male nudes usually do seem to be more of a just dick picks than taking the overall composition into consideration.
Yes. It is very possible for average dudes to look incredible naked, even to traditional beauty standards. Plenty of gay photographers take on this challenge and have portfolios filled with such shots (presumably in part for the challenge and in part for the subject matter).
Technically this is a tangent to the question you asked, save for the case where they do nude self-portraits. Nonetheless, I have been to a few homes where all the walls filled with their own photos of basically average gay bears in posing in very artistic ways that I’d assume were professional models, if not for the fact that I could identify subjects to their local ‘online dating’ profiles. (And to be clear, while some photos definitely have ‘I’m here to fuck’ energy, many more were going for tender vibes and artistic poses).
Guys with [good, interesting] tattoos appear to make great photography subjects - I suspect that it gives the artist something to compose the rest of the shot around. Unless you’re a modern prude, tattoos don’t carry the stigma they used to, they’re [often] artistic, and broadly well-fitted to the male beauty aesthetic.
Wish I could give you names and such, but in my defense I generally wasn’t visiting to see the wall art.
That’s good to know.
An artistic nude doesn’t need a “perfect” model. In fact what you’re describing is the distorted expectations set by the media towards men. Most women are NOT into that.
Also, neither dad bod nor “bear mode” require “shit tons of muscle mass just with a slight faded abs”.
Yeah, good point. Not properly understanding attraction in the first place and even less so from womens perspective has probably distorted the exceptions by media too much.
That part does probably come from rage bait of off season Chris Bumstead being referred to as having dad bad.
Under 10% is, yes, mostly unachievable for most people. But I think you might underestimate exactly what it means to be under 10%. You are basically a dried slug under 10%. For almost any body type, around 18%-25% body fat makes you universally sexy, especially if you put 2 hours in the gym a week, or you are generally outgoing/sporty.
I’d argue that significantly more is needed than just 2h per week in the gym and roughly 18-25%. 15%+ and abs are barely visible and I’ve been called fat peak bulk just because stomach was filled with food and I wasn’t flexing abs, faint outline was still visible.
but my view does seem to be rather distorted, so i wouldn’t be able to argue against it in good nature.
A lot of female nudes are also boring. It’s just that men tend to wander in the disgusting camp.
It surely helps that a lot of nudes of woman online tend to be made for profit. This warps the perception of reality.
Looking at gone wild it’s pretty equal.
Fair point, as i said it’s biased opinion.
I’m a middle-aged man who doesn’t exercise whatsoever and drinks heavily
I post a variety of stuff, from unhinged performance art to fairly elegant artistic nudes
They’re all well-received
They take effort, but I guarantee that the things that you think make a good photo aren’t what most women are looking for
That’s good to know, I’ve probably been influenced too much by social medias rage bait regarding that matter. Thanks for the grounding.
Whatever you do, completely ignore what guys say (with the notable exception of men like myself)
If you want to know what women like, ask women
And actually listen to them
None of the “yeah, but” bullshit
There is no “but”
Just listen to women.
Good point, just not understanding something tends to make overthink on the subject, but that subject probably falls unde the “just have to take their word for it” thing.
Yes! The meme is literal! Get some eye candy on gonewild going if we want the grow the community having a lot of good OC nudes is what we need, do it for Lemmy
For real though the meme is real, that’s a very sexy pic 🥵
My wife would probably not be really happy if i were to do that and besides im way too insecure/unconfident/uncomfortable(something in that ballpark) with pictures in the first place, i would never take a nude at all. Though i admire the people with the ability to do it.
I have to take your word on it.
For fucks sake ask your wife nudes don’t have to be selfies
username checks out
What? I’m missing something?
To hold the camera
If it’s a Botero nude, sure.
What’s that?
Famous Colombian painter who painted everyone as obese
Michelangelo’s David ?
He has a nice physique and amazing hair. I have neither.
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mark nsfw please
Damnnn, that’s a monster!!
A pink monster at that!
Helpful
Is this better? (Nsfw)
