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themaninblack@lemmy.world to memes@lemmy.world · 1 day ago

Dirty talk

lemmy.world

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Dirty talk

lemmy.world

themaninblack@lemmy.world to memes@lemmy.world · 1 day ago
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  • ameancow@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Counterpoint: ya’ll are taking sex too seriously.

    I know this is a joke, but I know well from experience that some kids are reading this joke and going “oh shit, what if I accidentally start going YEP YEP YEP the day I actually have sex!”

    If you’re not having fun and if you’re afraid of saying the wrong thing and looking awkward or silly, you’re with the wrong person. Go do whatever you want with anyone who consents, but it should NOT be stressful, it’s like the ONE thing we do together where we drop all our guards and be vulnerable and silly with each other. You can’t possibly be naked with someone and not feel a little silly, but you should also feel safe to be silly.

    • owsei@programming.dev
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      1 day ago

      Yes 100%. I love my girlfriend and that’s why we hold a conversation while having sex, it’s nice to talk to each other :)

    • raspberriesareyummy@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Unironically a great take, thank you for contributing that! :)

    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      ya’ll are taking sex too seriously.

      I will stop taking sex seriously when it stops being special. If I only have 20 minutes to properly enjoy intimacy once every two weeks, it is going to be fucking magical. Joke sex is for when you’re in the cuddle puddle in college, knowing there’s half a dozen other hotties down bad you’ve got to get through before the end of the week. Once you get older, you realize sex needs to be professional. There’s special outfits. There’s devices. There’s ritual. You read books on it. You get degrees in it.

      If you’re not having fun and if you’re afraid of saying the wrong thing and looking awkward or silly, you’re with the wrong person.

      Have you ever tried to cum at 40? Fun is for people with a second load in them in another thirty minutes and a three day weekend with nothing to do. Fun is for people who aren’t sneaking this out while the kids are down for a nap. Sex in middle age is Seal Team Six shit. Yeah, we’ve done the drills. We know what to expect. But now we’re in the field and we are on the clock. We get in, we do the deed, we hit the extraction point, and maybe we have time for a cigarette by morning… assuming everyone comes out alive.

      You can’t possibly be naked with someone and not feel a little silly

      I will hang from that sex swing and not even crack a smile.

      • ameancow@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        Wait… I am almost positive you were my last manager.

    • Digitalprimate@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Excellent comment.

  • potoooooooo ☑️@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Indeed! Indeed! INDEEEED!

    • SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      Affirmative…affirmative…

      • Mr. Semi@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

    • Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      I say! Simply extravagant cummies! 🧐👌

      • M0oP0o@mander.xyz
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        1 day ago

        I am arriving!

  • ummthatguy@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Aaaand a new kink is formed.

    • toiletobserver@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Brrrrrrrrrriiiiinnng

    • sidebro@lemmy.zip
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      1 day ago

      Delete this ☹️

    • SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      Well, what did they expect with talking vaginas?

  • stupidcasey@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

  • RunAroundDesertYou@feddit.org
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    1 day ago

    Literally a scene in Better Call Saul: https://youtu.be/T6jrPyLoAVc

    • jballs@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      Somehow I blocked that out from my memory

  • spirinolas@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    I actually had this conversation with a girl I was with. The “how funny it would be” conversation. Then we remembered this during sex and I started “yepping” and she laughed so much we had to stop. Eventually we got back into it and there was no more “yepping” and we both seemingly forgot it. Seemingly. When I was finishing I started going “brrrriiiinnggg”. I’m an idiot.

  • AlexLost@lemmy.world
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    23 hours ago

    Uh-huh!

  • SloganLessons@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    You don’t have to imagine, you can see a scene like this in Better Call Saul

    • drcobaltjedi@programming.dev
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      1 day ago

      Its also so unenthusiastic.

  • Devjavu@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 day ago

    OI!

  • Jyek@sh.itjust.works
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    23 hours ago

    This is a Dimitri Martin joke from back in the day. I miss him.

  • StinkyFingerItchyBum@lemmy.ca
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    1 day ago

    Ohn hon, ohn hon.

  • Eldritch@piefed.world
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    1 day ago

    Moonbeam city did something similar with “okay”

  • Natanox@discuss.tchncs.de
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    1 day ago

    Is that a plushy uterus?

    • Pat_Riot@lemmy.today
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      1 day ago

      They are Muppets called the Yip Yips.

      • relativestranger@feddit.nl
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        1 day ago

        they were one of my favourites.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    Repeating “Oh crap!” in a Wisconsinite’s accent.

    • FishFace@piefed.social
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      1 day ago

      Ope

    • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      keep going, I’m almost there!

      • Cort@lemmy.world
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        22 hours ago

        Oh, Yep, Yep, yep. Oh, you betcha!

  • Fleur_@lemmynsfw.com
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    “yessir”

    “Affirmative”

    “Roger”

    • burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de
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      I bet there’s some star wars ‘fans’ out there who’ve given a “roger, roger!” a time or two…

      • SkyezOpen@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        Her: I’m gonna cum

        Me:

    • gnutrino@programming.dev
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      1 day ago

      “In the pipe, five by five”

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