invest in some drill bits/hole saws rated for porcelain, and you can modify that shit off
I don’t see an artist signature
You’ll have to download the autograph app.
It’s a good app
They did a lot of work to remove the watermarks.
What kind of dickless bitch removes the fucking artist tags?!
Apologies to the good bitches
The kind that likes watching the world burn
“Also the hole is only big enough for farts.”
For poops, you need to upgrade to FlushMe Pro which is $200 monthly.
I’d just mail the manufacturer a bag of my shit.
I’m certain that already exists
Yah, I know there are super fancy toilets with app controllers. I’ve no doubt flushing is one of them.
Hijinks ensue when they put their phone in their pocket unlocked while their spouse or child is using the toilet.
$5.99 a month.
Double flush for only $10.00!
A higher tier gets you 5 unclogs a month and reduced ads!
plus all the data flows over their own server, therefore has 3 seconds latency, sometimes doesn’t work at all, and they retire the server after 5 years.
$19.99 a month for Unlimited flushes!
*Unlimited flushes are limited to 200 flushes, after that the flushing and tank refill rate are reduced to the 10% of the normal rate.
For unlimited unlimited flushes upgrade now to the Unlimited+ for $59.99 per month, subscription of one year required, penalty of 200% of the remaining year if cancelled.
**Unlimited+ does not include ad removal, user still has to watch a 30 seconds ad. Ad removal sold separately.
Also don’t forget the monthly fee
The cool thing about the wifi-enabled model is you get the built in camera and microphone as standard
And the FBI thought having to watch people through their computer screens was a shitty job.
…more like a shit job.
And then they will sell that data to health insurance
The older I get, the better I understand Archie Tuttle from Brasil.
My friend has a toilet that has its own remote control. There’s no flush handle. It’s the dumbest thing on earth.
And the app requires a non-jailbroken Apple or Android with strong play integrity plus photos of your face, your ID, and your shit to flush.
I’m normally a calm person. But this makes my blood boil.
And turn off DNS ad block and watch 3 unskippable ads to get an extra toilet paper. Wanna watch less ads? Agree to our use-your-excrement-to-train-ai and sell-your-data-to-our-10000-partners and you-can’t-sue-us-over-data-breach EULA to watch one our AI-generated personalized ad instead
Remember when “drink verification can” was a funny absurd scenario and not something that seems like it could happen any day now?
Upgrade to our master flusher package, which offers 30 flushes per week…
Don’t forget you will need to prove your identity by uploading your driving licence before you can download the app.
With a medium cost monthly subscription of course
Don’t laugh guys, this WILL happen in the near future
Fortunately, like brewing your own beer during the volstead act, a flush is basic enough to be able to do it yourself with a bit of string inside the cistern.
Or a pot of water to the bowl
Also similar to the BMW heated seats nonsense.
