• GreenSkree@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    They missed so many opportunities to make it actually a nightmare. Adding these should help…

    Standard plan:

    • 2 DPI settings. (50, 32000)

    Premium plan:

    • 3 DPI settings! (50, 100, 32000)
    • Ad Free!

    Pro-gamer plan ($45/mo)

    • Mouse acceleration toggle
    • 1 customizable DPI settings (more available @ $5/mo each)
    • Middle mouse click functionality unlocked! (Bound to backspace. Customizable binding @ $2/mo)
    • AI tooltips to suggest when/where to click next. ($5/Mo to disable)
    • Cloud backup*

    *Requires Internet connection. Mouse falls back to standard plan and settings when not connected. Requires device reboot to re-enable subscription after disconnect.

    Edit: formatting

    • BoxOfFeet@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      Well, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve read in a while. I have a Trackman from 2004 that’s still plugging along, no subscription software updates required. If your stuff isn’t shit, it lasts forever anyways.

    • Sam_Bass@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      My current led mouse has been going for 10 years with no signs of slowing down, so take that sub and stuff it

    • Schadrach@lemmy.sdf.org
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      4 days ago

      You know what, I’d be all behind a subscription mouse so long as it includes periodic hardware upgrades and unlimited warranty replacements no questions asked so long as the subscription is paid.

      Admittedly, I’d be trying to figure out the most interesting ways to actively destroy mice to make them rue the day they thought a mouse subscription was a good idea, but that’s beside the point. Why no, I can’t return the damaged mouse, it’s at the bottom of a hole in the woods no human has been down since the civil war. Just like it was none of your business how I found out that the mouse isn’t resistant to hydrofluoric acid.

    • macniel@feddit.org
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      5 days ago

      Close enough? Ma dude, Logitech really wanted to do this shit, but has to backpedal after getting massive flak.

    • GreatAlbatross@feddit.uk
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      4 days ago

      It’s reminding me of the 3rd party utility apps on the Apple Store.

      They seem to have ditched “limited features for free” in favour of “nothing at all until you subscribe, first 7 days free”

  • udon@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Business idea: The mouse manufacturers play the middle man in the click economy. Users can add an extra “click safety” package for $3,99/month, which prevents them from clicking on ads/misleading content. “Good” and “ethical” advertisers can get in touch with the “business communication” office of the mouse manufacturers to buy exception deals, because “their ads are okay”

  • Synapse@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    It’s all fun and games, until it becomes real and people buy it, then all competitors align and it’s the new norm.

  • iAvicenna@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    your red pixel clicking cartridge has run out. you wont be able to click on any other pixels until you refill your red pixel clicking cartridge.

  • fox@feddit.org
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    4 days ago

    Living in 2024, I’m not even sure if this is a joke or not. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a subscription for damn oxygen soon. Oh, wait, that’s taxes!

    • Iheartcheese@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      It’s only partially a joke. I can’t remember who but some company was bragging about their subscription based mouse they had in the works.

      Edit

      • Breadhax0r@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        This reads like an onion article. Who’s constantly buying new mice? And they’re trying to target consumers who “don’t have both a mouse and keyboard” by trying to sell them a $200 mouse…

        I’ve been using the same razer chroma I bought 15 years ago and it’s still perfectly fine.

  • taiyang@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    It’s a good thing that market is so saturated that there’d always be a cheap uncomplicated mouse with all your features, unless you’re some sort of MMO mouse person.

    That said, a company can probably still sell this to the government with enough lobbying. Those chumps love wasting cash on subscriptions they don’t need (looking at you, Adobe Cloud).

  • maiskanzler@feddit.nl
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    4 days ago

    Nah, I already got the 24,99 family plan that includes 500 premium clicks every month. I just hope they don’t follow through with their crackdown on account sharing.

      • Test_Tickles@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        When you click a button it’s actually two events, a button down and a button up. That is how you are able to grab something and move it, by clicking and holding and then later releasing.

        Premium clicks include both the button down and button up events. Non-premium clicks are button down only.

        • maiskanzler@feddit.nl
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          2 days ago

          Remember to unclick your buttons if you’re not paying for premium clicks. You wouldn’t want to continously keep reordering toilet paper from Amazon, would you?

  • humanspiral@lemmy.ca
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    4 days ago

    I’ve managed to pay under $20 for all I can click mice. They last more than a year typically. Even with tariffs, I’m getting a chinese mouse, and y’all can f the f off.

    • Mesophar@lemm.ee
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      2 days ago

      That honestly sounds like a bad deal. Before recently replacing it, I had a $35 dollar mouse that lasted through 12 years of heavy gaming. Either you are inhumanly rough on your mice, or you might want to spend a little bit more for something quality.