Guys please, I actually need help. Is this a real segment?
After the m&m segment I genuinely CANNOT tell anymore
Great. So much for smushing a dick-veined Snickers into my virgin Cherry Ripe.
Tucker is pissed because he likes the mouth feel of Snickers.
Tucker Carlson the type of mfer to eat a Snickers upside down for the texture.
Is that really gone? I guess that shows how long it’s been since I’ve eaten a Snickers. And now I know why.
“whats going on here? what are we doing?”
Not to mention how much smaller they are now. 😤
Dicks?
Those too.
now i’m scared to ask
What am I gonna do when I feel lonely and hungry now? Someone send help please.
now when someone says eat a bag of dicks and throws me a bag of fun size snickers, we can’t have a laugh at all because there’s no vein. did you think about that mattel and mars bar corporation? did you?
Everyone is talking about the Snickers bar’s dick vein, and I’m over here fuming about the Mr. Big bar’s shrinkage, which would be more accurately named Mr. Merely Average.
They don’t want our candy to be fuckable! First they came for the green m&m and I said nothing, and now look how far we have strayed from the light of GOD!

From what I can find, it was a troll post from 2022, and Tucky TumTums fell for it as usual. But I’m not 100% on this.
Knowing what I know about Tucker, he doesn’t care if it was a troll post. Reality and fiction don’t really matter when your entire platform is this reactionary bullshit. Half of what he says about real things are lies anyway.
This is nothing to snicker at.
veins on the tongue crew: checking in.
Nah, if this is headlines then you know they’re desperate for attention. Woke is so back.

I can hear his laugh
Goddammit now I’m hearing it too. He’s not welcome in my head.











