• TouchMacaque@lemmy.ca
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    4 hours ago

    If you play the triangle in the Bermuda triangle everyone who’s ever died there comes back to life, but with a catch. All the men have Jenkem filled balls and all the women have smegma filled tits. That’s why no one has ever done it, no one wants hundreds of disgusting abominations risen from the dead.

    There’s one exception to this though, a weird Christian cult in the 1970s believe that when Jesus resurrected and escaped from his tomb he actually walked on water all the way to the Bermuda triangle where he died for realsies. The cult members all made a pilgrimage there to play the triangle to resurrect him again but they all died.

    • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      4 hours ago

      no one wants hundreds of disgusting abominations risen from the dead.

      Uhhhhh, hold on. I need to buy a cruise ship ticket, and bring a triangle! I absolutely want to bring a swarm of human killing zombies to life. Also, I need the cruise ship to be empty besides me, and crew. We need the space to bring all the zombies aboard, and then bring them all to America. Where they’ll be free to kill all the humans.

      Yes. I absolutely DO want this! Booking cruise ship now.