Midnight Wolf

That seems like really bad efficiency, or really expensive power. I used to have a Nissan Leaf that would do over 5 miles to the kW. Even with rather substantial battery degradation, I could get 80 miles to a charge, and a full charge would run me about $1.25 at the local utility rates.

Well, this is my stop

screams see you tomorrow

“the balls grapes are inert”

Grapes don’t make wine, silly. They’re inert.

Jfc, first they had like some coin miner, then dubious analytics or settings or something, now the head dude is a bigot? It’s like an as-seen-on-TV ad: “but wait, there’s more!”

Taking ‘bullet dildo’ a touch too literally. Leave it to a fox…

Hehe, butt knob

Speak for yourself

I’m doing my part!

Okay grandpa, let’s get you back to the senior center…

“You were supposed to cover me, wtf and you call yourself prestige 8 on cod? I’ve seen bots smarter than you.”

teabagging their coworker/teammates that they just betrayed for the lols

“and they pay me for this shit lmao FUCK YOU MOM I TOLD YOU MY SKILLS WOULD PAY OFF”

Hey there, you busy later?~

Me: punches them in the face

Me: haha just pranking bro

Vault is visible and therefore obvious. If you need to be discreet, this sounds useful.

🍎

Ah, I can answer #5:

drops my pants and backs up to the doorknob this is for you, babe… all that knot training is going to finally pay off

What, then everyone can touch you! I’m okay with that, if it’s what you want. Wait, why are you mad? What did I say? How am I in trouble for trying to make you happy? You asked the question, I’m just being supportive…

What is that saying, ‘lack of planning on your part doesn’t constitute an emergency on my part’ or something.

My friends know that they only call me if their house is actively on fire, they are being robbed at gunpoint, or they just won the lottery and want to split the winnings. Family also includes lunch/dinner plans. Only exception is when we have planned a call for a date and time, otherwise you’re greeting my voicemail. Landlines is the exact same situation. I might be taking a shower, asleep, taking a dump, getting freaky with a friend; it doesn’t matter. Leave a text message and I’ll get back as soon as I’m done crying from taco tuesday, or finishing waking up the neighbors with moans and screams, or whatever else.

Email is ‘sometime today’ communication, and gets handled at the beginning or end of the day, or whenever I’m on the can. Anyone expecting a rapid response via email is a proper dunce.

As a disabled dude who sits down on the shitter with the force of a kid literally jumping into bed, I give this toilet 2 visits with my ass before it tears off the wall.