Midnight Wolf

Can confirm

Rekt 😎

Nintendo’s numbers

N: “here is a new Mario game or something, whatever, nobody cares anymore, $80 pricing why not”

Customers: excited screaming and trampling each other

driving on the other side of the road

“pssh, there’s hardly any traffic over here, and the ones here get out of my way and cheer me on with honks and flashing their lights.”

See, I’m engaging with others! :D

Need to pump those numbers up, rookie numbers

Are we supposed to combine them, or…?

needs to get exploited to cover bills

let’s have a baby :D

while I am moderately humored by the initial gesture, you and your partner are idiots, CJ

😳 Hiii

Geeky femboys 🥺👉👈

…I dare you to give it a taste test

Hollywood doesn’t want you to know this one weird trick

Money. Not gift cards, not ‘you’ll take me out for a fancy lunch’, not ‘I’ll buy you something off your Amazon wishlist’. Money. Cold, physical currency.

Why? Parents and relatives are denser than a concrete bomb shelter. I don’t want furniture, I don’t want games, I don’t want gift certificates. If I want something, I’ll buy it myself. And for my ‘splurge’ list, you know what, sure mom. I want an XL David from Bad Dragon, in natural colors, and in a soft+medium firmness. And, because I want to feel like I am being spitroasted, a small Flint, in natural, and soft. I do need to work on my gag reflex. Oh, you’ll just give me cash? Okay then. Don’t open any package addressed to me, mmkay?

It’s when they start scanning coupons that you don’t know about that they have the hots for you. Fifty cents off toothpaste? 😳🥵

I do love literal wording like this. Cheesecake also comes to mind, just slap some Monterey Jack onto my birthday cake, thanks.

Same, I was very confused lol

Lisinopril 5mg

Ah, is that all you’ve got? Round these parts if your combined dosage is less than 80mg, you can’t join the club. Thems the rules, sorry.

🐺

No, money down!

Ha ha, because he is in the middle, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Wait, what do you mean that’s not the joke? Cut this guy next. Ha ha ha ha ha.

I

what