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Cake day: July 16th, 2023

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  • I don’t have the equipment for a nighttime emission, but the only sex dreams I’ve ever had were with partners that I felt really weird about in the morning. They include: a friend of mine, a different friend’s dad, and Mikhail Gorbachev. I don’t want to fuck any of them.


  • idiomaddict@lemmy.worldtomemes@lemmy.worldWillkommen.
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    4 days ago

    The problem is when my memes only appeal to DaZ learners. German speakers think they’re dumb (they are, I’m just getting started on German puns, so they’re like little kids’ jokes) and non German speakers don’t get them. I don’t mind being the only one to think I’m funny, but sometimes I get genuine joy out of puns that I would like to share, if only there were an audience

    Example (Edit: my lazy ass didn’t even want to make a meme to illustrate this, so you just get the description of it): seit dem Seifenmassakre hat sich alles geändert. Jetzt hab ich Albträume und reagiere auf Seifenblasen unangemessen. Zu mindest muss ich kein Duschgel mehr kaufen.

    Es ist wahr, ich werde jetzt für immer Schauma haben

    Translation (important notes at the end): everything changed since the soap massacre. Now I’ve got nightmares and a disproportionate reaction to soap bubbles. At least I don’t ever have to buy shower gel again.

    It’s true, I’ll always have Schauma from now on.

    Note: the word for foam in German is Schaum, trauma is the same, Schauma is a shower gel brand, and all I can think of when I see it is dogs having nam flashbacks to being washed


  • Everyone says that layers are the answer, but A) I don’t want to carry all of my shed layers around, and B) my least favorite part of winter is how tense my shoulders and neck get from the weight of all of my layers.

    That said, 25 degrees Celsius is my limit for enjoying heat, so unless there’s somewhere with 10-20 degree weather year round and it’s not constantly cloudy/rainy, I’m stuck accepting winter.


  • The weirdest part is how as soon as I decided to give up and wear comfy, ugly (to me) clothes, they came back in style. I straight up started wearing my dad’s old clothes (I’m afab, maybe an egg, but I definitely read as a woman to others) and long socks (in the cooler months- part of getting older for me is that things start to ache when they get cold), which I felt a little insecure about. Then somehow shortly thereafter the kids in my college town started doing it too. I’m glad younger women don’t feel like they have to wear all the uncomfortable stuff I did though, it’s just a little surprising.




  • Ehh, Jesus isn’t a super uncommon name.

    When I was a little kid, we got a Christmas card from the newspaper delivery boy (I swear I’m not that old, but that sounds ancient), signed “Jesus.” My mom was a devout Catholic and got offended at what she saw as tip-motivated blasphemy. My dad let her cook for a bit, until she made to call the newspaper, then he delicately suggested that it was probably pronounced with an “h” sound. My mom probably sounds pretty unpleasant from this anecdote so far, but she laughed her ass off at herself for not thinking about that possibility and felt very sheepish about it.


  • 0.5% strongly approve, rounds up to 1%. 39.5% somewhat approve, rounds up to 40%. The proportion of people who, to varying degrees, approve is then listed as 41%, because otherwise people would see it as them saying 1+40=40.

    People are going to say they don’t understand math either way, so they just need to pick a convention and stick to it.


  • To be fair, they’re not entirely equivalent. I wouldn’t bristle at all at being called “an American,” but I would never call someone “a Chinese.” In the plural form with a definite article, it doesn’t feel as bad, but I’d probably prefer to say “Chinese people,” whereas “American people” feels a little clunky, though it’s probably the best option if you want to keep both terms the same.

    I don’t think this is necessarily a racist thing though, because I’d probably be fine saying “the French/ Congolese /Japanese*” and “Guatemalans/ Nigerians/ Tibetans/ Swedes.” Demonyms are definitely a weird area of language that feels biased when you see a direct comparison though.

    *interestingly, I couldn’t think of a “new world” country where I would say “the+singular demonym,” but it does sound right for some tribal nations, like “the Hopi/Navajo.” I don’t think it’s uniform though, because “Pequots/Algonquins” sound much better than “the Pequot/Algonquin” to me and I’m not sure why.