• ma1w4re@lemmy.zip
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    6 hours ago

    “life sucks shit” I thought when I was a virgin, “life sucks shit” I think after I lost my virginity a month ago. Idk why but I feel like an old man in my 24. Certainly not getting any hotter.

    • assaultpotato@sh.itjust.works
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      6 hours ago

      Your 20s suck. No one talks about this. 22-26 were the worst years of my life. I just turned 30 and while I “regret” losing some time of my youth and wish I had more of it, my life is only getting better.

      In my 20s I thought I knew what my life was gonna look like, but really there’s so much that you’re still experiencing for the first time. 20s are tumultuous and chaotic, you’re typically low on money, unsure of what you want out of life, unsure of what you’re capable of, and at least for me, I wasn’t sure anything good could possibly come from the mess I felt I created.

      Sometime around 27-28 the absurdity of it all kinda hit me, and I realized that I actually am kind of capable of handling my affairs, the people around me also generally stopped acting like chaotic idiots, and I kind of “found my groove” so to speak. So far I have more money and stability than I thought was possible (partially by learning what I didn’t actually want to spend money on), my work life is much less chaotic, and considering myself to be capable has resulted in my workplace taking me more seriously as well.

      It can get better. I think everyone’s 20s suck. It’s a time when you have the minimum money you realistically ever will, with all of the responsibilities of a real adult but none of the authority or stability of one. Everyone around you is dumb as shit and figuring themselves out too, so even if you have yourself largely figured out, you’re still somewhat at the mercy of your social group’s stability.

      Hang in there friend.

      • jade52@lemmy.ca
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        6 hours ago

        This is a great answer. I’m 38 now, and whenever I catch myself romantasizing the past, I remind myself how fucking awful my life was from 18-26. I was in a controlling and manipulative relationship, I had no money, had no idea what I wanted to do or who I was as a person. I kind of just partied with my friends and went to work, and that’s all that mattered. At 26 I started hanging out with people at work sometimes instead of only my high school friends, which snowballed into about 10 years of slowly getting better as I worked to be a better person. It does get better. 20s really do suck and it should be acknowledged more.

      • nawa@lemmy.world
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        4 hours ago

        Can’t agree more, this is so true. My life was utter shit until 26. I was sure it would stay shit forever, because there was no reason something would get better.

        Then I had to move to another country. This decision was forced by life events but it ended up being the best decision in my life. I had to “grow up”, learn how to work in an alien environment. I had to understand what I wanted from myself. I had to improve myself a lot. I’ve also met so many great people, had so many new experiences, and while I’m in a downturn right now, I am better than I ever was back then. Like you, I also feel a bit bad I missed out on some of the “fun” stuff from my 20s but in the end, my life experience got me to this point and I enjoy being here.

        Growing up and figuring yourself out is the best.

      • Ghostie@lemmy.zip
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        5 hours ago

        Must be nice. Hoping things work that way for me too. In my 30s and have yet to get those benefits.