I met a fellow in my neighborhood by happenstance. We happened to be crazy similar. He was really cool.
I felt bad not really getting around to checking in on him more often. I was shy and afraid of what I didn’t know, or making a fool of myself. But damnit he was a really cool guy…
Occasionally I’d catch him with his garage door open and we’d have a chat. (You gotta understand, nobody interacts in this neighborhood.) We met because I was out running in the rain like a crazy guy (we rarely get rain lol) and HE decided to introduce himself to me as I ran by his house LOL.
So anyway…I saw he hadn’t responded to my Merry Christmas text.
…And just a week ago or so I got a text from his wife that he had passed away from an aneurysm 4 months prior.
When I brought her flowers for him, she told me he had said that he thought. . .that I was very cool. . .
Why I’m sharing this:
I know it’s awkward sometimes trying to make new friends as an adult, but also it’s foolish to simply assume tomorrow is guaranteed. Do that hangout. Plan the game night. Talk about random stuff in the backyard. Whatever.
You will never regret more time spent in fellowship and good company.
I would have been a really good friend to him if I just reached out more…
The loneliness epidemic is absolutely real, and this isolating society is killing us all by design and it breaks my heart.
Wow, this comment chain went from heartwarming to depressing real fast. I’m sorry you lost your friend.
The loneliness epidemic is absolutely real, and this isolating society is killing us all by design and it breaks my heart.
That’s true, but internet pseudo-feminists seem intent on declaring that the loneliness epidemic isn’t real and is just made up by the manosphere to oppress women.
(This isn’t a statement against feminism, but the idea that anything that hurts men is feminist isn’t really feminism)
Hah, sorry, I didn’t mean it to be depressing. True, I was kinda venting a painful experience but . . .my sincere hope is that someone might learn from my mistakes, and finally stop putting off spending time with people who matter to them.
There will always be excuses to put it off til “next time”, “one day”, “eventually…”, but we don’t have forever to get over them, and we need our fellows more than we ever have.
And yeah, the terminally-online are a frightening combination of “ferociously bitter” and “obsessed with being ‘a part of something’”, that they actually rejoice in the suffering of others as if oppression is some kind of football game.
I want no part of whatever someone like that is selling.
If I could get them to realize one thing, it would be that feminism isn’t about women participating in patriarchal structures of oppression as oppressors; it’s about abolishing patriarchal structures of oppression.
If I got a bonus thing, it would be getting them to realize that patriarchy also harms men, that toxic masculinity harms men (and can be perpetuated by women), and that only a relatively small percentage of men can be categorized as “oppressors.”
An oligarch is an oligarch, whether man or woman. And bullying a vulnerable man because he’s an easier target than an actual oppressor is not “smashing the patriarchy.”
I met a fellow in my neighborhood by happenstance. We happened to be crazy similar. He was really cool.
I felt bad not really getting around to checking in on him more often. I was shy and afraid of what I didn’t know, or making a fool of myself. But damnit he was a really cool guy…
Occasionally I’d catch him with his garage door open and we’d have a chat. (You gotta understand, nobody interacts in this neighborhood.) We met because I was out running in the rain like a crazy guy (we rarely get rain lol) and HE decided to introduce himself to me as I ran by his house LOL.
So anyway…I saw he hadn’t responded to my Merry Christmas text.
…And just a week ago or so I got a text from his wife that he had passed away from an aneurysm 4 months prior.
When I brought her flowers for him, she told me he had said that he thought. . .that I was very cool. . .
Why I’m sharing this:
I know it’s awkward sometimes trying to make new friends as an adult, but also it’s foolish to simply assume tomorrow is guaranteed. Do that hangout. Plan the game night. Talk about random stuff in the backyard. Whatever.
You will never regret more time spent in fellowship and good company.
I would have been a really good friend to him if I just reached out more…
The loneliness epidemic is absolutely real, and this isolating society is killing us all by design and it breaks my heart.
That is all.
Wow, this comment chain went from heartwarming to depressing real fast. I’m sorry you lost your friend.
That’s true, but internet pseudo-feminists seem intent on declaring that the loneliness epidemic isn’t real and is just made up by the manosphere to oppress women.
(This isn’t a statement against feminism, but the idea that anything that hurts men is feminist isn’t really feminism)
Hah, sorry, I didn’t mean it to be depressing. True, I was kinda venting a painful experience but . . .my sincere hope is that someone might learn from my mistakes, and finally stop putting off spending time with people who matter to them.
There will always be excuses to put it off til “next time”, “one day”, “eventually…”, but we don’t have forever to get over them, and we need our fellows more than we ever have.
And yeah, the terminally-online are a frightening combination of “ferociously bitter” and “obsessed with being ‘a part of something’”, that they actually rejoice in the suffering of others as if oppression is some kind of football game.
I want no part of whatever someone like that is selling.
If I could get them to realize one thing, it would be that feminism isn’t about women participating in patriarchal structures of oppression as oppressors; it’s about abolishing patriarchal structures of oppression.
If I got a bonus thing, it would be getting them to realize that patriarchy also harms men, that toxic masculinity harms men (and can be perpetuated by women), and that only a relatively small percentage of men can be categorized as “oppressors.”
An oligarch is an oligarch, whether man or woman. And bullying a vulnerable man because he’s an easier target than an actual oppressor is not “smashing the patriarchy.”
Thanks for sharing that story, we should all try to get to know our neighbours a bit Better.