the thing with long term depression, no amount of consequences seem real compared to the promise of feeling any positive emotions for a few minutes.

the main reason I didn’t try it is because I fear all the consequences and also I fear that I won’t feel anything good from it. tried other drugs like weed and shrooms and they are all disappointingly meh, I think my brain might be immune to some drugs. tried a dose higher than a hero dose and all it did is keep me awake with no other effects. it was annoying.