We did the same thing, but I was the smart dumbass who knew that’s how you lose fingers, so I had us hide behind a board and drop a bowling ball into it. It cracked the fucking ball! My parents were livid

I love this comment chain so much. You have not linked anything now. Lmao

Did you mean to link me to the chocolate milk comment? Have I hurt you in some way‽ D: haha

Ha! I love that joke at the end.

It is tough being AMAB and loving the caring aspects of life. It’s as if the world sees you as a predator, and inside you’re just wanting to protect and love and care. It’s sad :(

God, it’s remarkable how similar that is to me. I’m not ace, and I’m only NB in secret, but holy shit. Same. My dad’s reaction was less awful, though

I’m so fucking impressed, and simultaneously I feel like a dumbass for never getting it

I’d be down to try that cough syrup

Oh my God

I always knew there was a reason God didn’t make me a rich man.

But what about the crazy German dungeon porn and the sex clubs‽

I somehow missed the twitter craze by accident. Was active on Myspace and then Facebook, but I always preferred my forums. Once I left all other social media, reddit was all that was left, and now Lemmy. It feels a lot more like what I miss, but still isn’t quite the same

Idk, I’ve noticed a lot of people on Lemmy that tend towards their 40s or 50s

Took me far too long to realize this was a reference to the movie, and not a random philosophy post about the impermanence of life

You know how if you’re reading a headline from the onion and you mistake it for real you’ve “eaten the onion?”

Is there a name for the reverse phenomenon? Where a real headline reflecting actual reality is so ridiculous that you reject it out of hand as satire only to realize it was genuine? Regurgitating the onion? What’s the name for this?

I did Nazi that joke coming…

For years, my dogs favorite toy was a nerf branded football made for dogs.

He would cuddle it, and whenever he got excited and actually chewed it, he would then whimper and cry and cuddle it more, because he hurt his baby

I like to think that they think of their toys as alive. You and the toy collaborated to create a fun game of SUPER LOUD SNIFFS to find the toy lol

For some reason, the sound is broken on mine, I guess. There’s no audio at all

I wish my fingerprint scanner worked D:

Honestly, the only two problems I have had at all are fingerprint scanner (like, lowest priority for me), and the battery continues to drain quickly even when I close the laptop or put it in sleep mode or whatever it’s called