Captain Aggravated

I have cloned indeterminate tomato plants using my fingers. Snap off a sucker and stick it in some wet dirt, you’ll have a whole new tomato plant.

I found some tortillas that have a lot of fiber, so I haven’t been buying supplements.

I mean you don’t put our hand just into your waist band to ease chafing at the belt line?

I hear “girlboss” and I envision someone who thinks in hashtags.

What about that doesn’t sound like a “girlboss” to you?

Here’s what you do: Take a can of sweetened condensed milk. Simmer it, can and all, for 3 hours. Slice a granny smith into wedges. the apple, not grampy smith’s wife, you psychopath. Dip the apple into the resulting dulce de leche. Enjoy the combination of tart apple with the creamy sweet caramelly goodnes. Probably die from whatever heavy metals leeched out of the can. Only six months before the dirty bombs fall. Lucky sod.

On the next episode of Hopeless Kitchen, we explore the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean. See you next time I guess.

It’s always going to be a band-aid ripping moment, switching from MS Office to anything else.

When I switched to Linux on my personal setups, it was at a time when Windows and Office were so different to what I was used to, I’d have to retool and retrain anyway. From what I hear from some of my white collar acquaintances, that’s basically coming. I’ve been hearing things like “I wrote this spreadsheet 20 years ago, it’s worked fine for decades, and now it’s breaking because they’re disabling VBA and it can’t run from OneDrive.” So I think we’re going to enter an era when all the things that probably shouldn’t have been implemented in Excel are gonna stop working.

He’s somewhere here in North Carolina, right? EpicFuckupSoftware is based in Cary now? Do we have a more precise fix on his location?

Those huge glasses that were in vogue in the 80’s did no one any favors.

Izzy mearned a new trick, she stood on the end table and puked on the floor. The very innovative cliff puke.

Out of the women I’ve dated, fully half of them were violent towards me. I’ve been slapped, punched, whatever you call the gesture of swinging your hand with a hammer, like banging on a door, scratched, bitten, kicked, had food spat in my face, I’ve been hit with blunt objects and had things thrown at me.

The most violent thing I’ve ever done to a woman was hold her down. I pinned her hands to the back of the couch to make her stop hitting me.

I’ve got no patience at all for any whining about how it’s not fair I’m strong enough to rearrange her face but she’s not strong enough to rearrange mine. I’ve been hit enough and if I’m hit again I’m hitting back.

My “prep” plan is mostly hurricane based. I have a sump pump, generator, a 2-weeks supply of non-perishable food, a camping stove, plus my backyard propane grill, and of course my cordless tools, and now my little power station with solar panels. I sat my ass through Fran, Ivan and Matthew, I’ll sit my ass through the next one.

Does that say something about European travel, or European families?

and then you’ve got 90 seconds until it’s rotten.

Do the Ocampa make any sense? In one episode, Kes goes into heat, she says it’s the only time she ever will, and Ocampa are shown to have a litter size of around 1. So…how has this species survived their own 0.5 at best replacement ratio?

Tom Hanks’ character in Big?

we’ll have to start calling them titroaches.

Given how it lines up with the phrase “bed time” we’re likely looking at a 3 digit house number and a 4 letter street name, probably ending in a y, so somethign like 123 July St. Though in a town as large as Los Angeles you do have a lot of hunting to do there.

There may be some policy that they have to give the entire clearance in one shot, but ffs show at least a crustacean’s level of self-awareness.

I had a clearance delivery controller do this to me:

“Cessna 123AB, cleared to Somewhereton Regional as filed, Runway 5 MUNCH departure, climb and maintain 5,000 feet, expect 9,000 feet in 10 minutes, contact Exampleville departure 122.9, squawk _hubbajubba.”

“Exampleville clearance, Cessna 3AB, could you repeat the squawk code?”

“Cessna 123AB, cleared to Somewhereton Regional as filed, Runway 5 MUNCH departure, climb and maintain 5,000 feet, expect 9,000 feet in 10 minutes, contact Exampleville departure 122.9, squawk _hubbajubba.”

“Exampleville clearance, 3AB, I still didn’t catch the squawk code. REPEAT THE SQUAWK CODE.”

“Cessna 123AB, cleared to Somewhereton Regional as filed, Runway 5 MUNCH departure, climb and maintain 5,000 feet, expect 9,000 feet in 10 minutes, contact Exampleville departure 122.9, squawk _hubbajubba.”

“Exampleville clearance, 3AB, cleared to somewhereton as filed, MUCH departure, maintain 5,000 feet expect 9,000 in one zero minutes, call departure on 122.9, squawk 4422?”

“3AB, readback correct, call ground point niner.”

… 😤