I always feel like rolling my eyes whilst Americans slowly drawl the month at me before telling me the day of the month I wanted

“Dec…”

Oh god, you’re American

“…em…”

Here we go, we’re going for it

“…berrrrr”

Yes, we’re getting there

“…rrrrrrr”

Hopefully we get to the date, or I’m going to have to ask someone else

[inhales]

Why did it have to be an American

“Twenty….”

Please not the year

“…-seventh”

Hallelujah, thank the lord, we have a date. Oh Jesus, why such an ordeal. So much time for stupid intrusive thoughts. What was it again…?

Admittedly like most of this is my failings as a person