Username…checks,uh…out?

Just gave everyone with the power to launch a nuke a huge penis and a sense of confident but gentle masculinity with sorcery.

Going to .ml looking for an enlightened discussion is like going to the zoo looking for a glory hole.

Now you got all these gators hanging out at the docks sucking dick for meth

Me, but ibuprofen.

Your grandmother has outstanding constitution. Bon appetit!

Think I’m gonna print this out and put it over my sink.

You know who’d love these?

There is a not-insignificant subset of medieval art depicting battles with rabbits, and I’m absolutely convinced this is where Monty Python got the idea.

What seems to be the problem, officer? 🥰

Taught mine to roll a joint, then he took all my weed and sold it, came back acting like he had no idea what happened and was all like idk I just found this new Apple Watch.

Now this I can get behind!

Well maybe if he wasn’t so fucking furtive!

Am I the only one who puts their pygmy in the car the night before so they don’t forget?

Indoor

kid in the back raises his fin, gets eaten by passing barracuda

I’m reminded of being in the army years ago, one weekend we were doing taser gun training. Part of the training required everyone get shot with the thing at least once, that way you knew how it felt and what you’d be doing to someone if you had to use it. So that was our morning.

In the afternoon training was done by 1 when they expected it to take until 4 or so. So we ended up just sitting around for three hours. Fifty soldiers. Not allowed to leave early. Bored out of their minds. In a facility with taser guns, a couple hundred cartridges meant for training, and no supervision. Perfect recipe for hijinks.

Ended up being a memorable afternoon tbh. Lot of laughs.

Is it possible to learn this power?

You know, as the original Lucifer, I’d have thought you’d be more enthusiastic about this.