• Carnelian@lemmy.world
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    4 hours ago

    Hey as long as we’ve got experts here, could a purely non binary person be considered gay or heterosexual in any configuration or are they always bisexual? Even if only as a limitation of the language?

    To elaborate on that I am nonbinary and bisexual myself and without missing a beat it’s like every non-binary person I meet is also bisexual. And that’s all good and all feels very natural, and nobody should feel pressured to be anything else

    But like, if I was trying to not be bisexual, what would that look that? Would I just start listing specific preferences and the orientation just wouldn’t have a particular name?

      • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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        2 hours ago

        I’ve considered that, and I agree in theory, but is that something that occurs on the level of sexual attraction?

        In practice I feel like it’s a romantic quality, i.e. “since we are both non-binary, I feel we understand each other and I feel especially safe with you, and in fact this type of relationship is the only one I would want”,

        I suppose in this manner you could easily be a gay demisexual enbie, but I wonder of the larger cohort of people who experience a more immediate sexual attraction

        Again, not that it’s important to have this all ironed out neatly. I just feel like it hasn’t been ironed out neatly, you know?

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          1 hour ago

          In practice I feel like it’s a romantic quality, i.e. “since we are both non-binary, I feel we understand each other and I feel especially safe with you, and in fact this type of relationship is the only one I would want”,

          That does sound a lot like demisexual to me.

          If you call yourself homosexual I worry that some people might misinterpret it and try and figure out a binary gender for you, which is unhelpful.

          You could just say you’re attracted to other enbies if someone asks? One word labels aren’t always the most important thing.