• djmikeale@feddit.dk
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    11 hours ago

    I reckon people have different opinions on “what spending time together” entails - ranging from

    • being in the same room doing different stuff
    • Sitting next to each other doing different stuff
    • sitting next to each other watching the same movie
    • Talking together Etc.
    • HerbGrower@slrpnk.net
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      7 hours ago

      My partner sometimes mentions spending more time together. I want it to be more quality time though and not just sat watching brainrot reality TV.

      At least that isn’t all she watches, there are some things she likes that I do enjoy watching together. But when she finds a few new reality TV things and watches that I will just go and do something else.

      • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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        7 hours ago

        been in that relationship where ‘time together’ is ‘do shit that i like, that you hate’.

        But never the other way around. Bad relationship.

    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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      9 hours ago

      for some folks it means you can’t have any other hobbies/friends/interests that dont include them.

      this is called co-dependency.

      I had a girlfriend once who basically would not let me leave the house without her, to like even go buy milk. she was so insecure she lacked object permanence. Of course, I didn’t know this about her until we lived together. But basically after a few months we broke up because I was basically living with a toddler, and in her mind I was the abusive awful person, for thinking I could go leave the house for 5 minutes without her, and fi I wanted to like come home later and get some time alone, that was ABUSE.

      Oh right, and she used to run every morning and if I was feeling sick or otherwise not up to running with her… I was ABUSING HER.

      Her own parents tried to talk her down out of absurd was she was being, but she simple took that as me having manipulated her parents to my side… yeah… she was not well.

      • djmikeale@feddit.dk
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        2 hours ago

        Wow that sounds like an insane relationship. I guess she only really dared being herself after you moved in together? Hopefully you managed to get out without too many scars on your soul.

        • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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          1 hour ago

          We were both each other’s first serious partner, we had no clue what we were doing. We just loved each other and thought that was all that mattered. It was 15 years ago so it’s pretty much an afterthought. I had worse partners since her who were not just ignorant, but straight up malicious and manipulative.