There’s such double standards when it comes to pets!

If a dog shits outside, it gets praise.
If I shit outside, I’m told that I’m no longer on the football team.

When a cat or dog snores, everyone (including me) thinks it’s adorable.
When I snore, people start yelling and telling me that I’ve failed my driving test again.

What are you gonna do, call Feline Ressources?

Cat owners are the weirdest …

C’mon! Bring your pitchforks, I’m not afraid of you!